August 15, 2016 by traumermarchen
You are about to read my new blog, Eight Bits of My Mind. Relax. Concentrate. Dispel every other thought. Let the world around you fade. Best to close the door.
I will not always crib passages from other authors (in this case Italo Calvino), but since there was a blockage in getting my own words to flow, it seemed appropriate to turn to someone else’s.
Beginnings are interesting things, and in spite of what you might have seen in the Neverending Story (based on the work of Michael Ende), they are not always dark.
My own was apparently quite bright.
That might have had something to do with being put under a lamp in an Oxygen chamber because I was born with neonatal bilirubin. However, I did not get to see that bright beginning. Arnall Patz (one of my cousins well removed) had previously discovered that pure oxygen was corrosive to infant eyes, so I was blindfolded.
I was born a boy. I did not consider it particularly important at the time, nor have I remained so. But to understand me you must first understand: I was once a boy.
That (coupled with Marlo Thomas’ Free to be You and Me) was one of the magical amulets to get me through childhood. Because of that collection of skits and songs, I knew that nothing could change the fact that I was a boy (and most certainly not my sensitivity to the moods of people around me or my lifelong passion for ballet).
This was great at the time, when it afforded me a strong defense against the gender policing of five year olds, but became an obstacle when I later needed to cast off my maleness.
I will most surely return to my thoughts on Free to be You and Me. But that, my friends, is another story.